SIX

During the first semester of college a lot of things change for a lot of students, and I was no exception. I started off this year knowing exactly what I wanted to do with my life, where I wanted to go, what I wanted to be... But as the semester went on, I started to change my mind. I'm in a bit of a limbo with where I want to go in life, but for now, I'm okay with it. A lot of things have changed in such a short time for me and consequently made me grow as a person. I'm not exactly sure what I want to do or where I want to go anymore, but I do know that no matter what I am a very strong individual and I can get myself through anything. This first semester put a lot into perspective for me. I have always done everything on my own, so I feel as though I was prepared for living on my own and being away from home. I think that my independence has grown even more so now, though. Most things didn't end up like I thought they would by any means, but I have learned to move on and forward with life. I think my ability to adapt and carry on has been the biggest way I've grown this semester, and I hope to continue to do so in the rest of my life.

FIVE

The Hixson award is important to me for more than one reason. The biggest reason of course is that it gave me the opportunity to go to college. Without this award I would have had to go to a community college, if I was able to go at all. It also gave me the opportunity to meet some really great people. Purple Squad! The class itself also gave me a lot of good information I may not have known about otherwise. Overall, this award has given me great opportunities.

FOUR

in case you were wondering, this is the fourth time i've written this. it won't post every time i try and it also will not copy paste so i can save it. ... it's been fun.

I learned a lot from social media week. The one thing I took away from this the most was that you need to be really careful about everything you do online. Everything you say or post can come back to you. Now that i'm older and going to start looking for serious jobs soon, what I post will play a larger factor into my job offers.

I felt fine about my social media. I chose Twitter. I think that my generation has an advantage at technological services because we've grown up with technology. Twitter was very easy for me to learn and get used to and I am still using it.

Social media can help me reach my goals because it helps you reach out to people who are interested in the same things as you. If I were to tweet about a job I wanted and someone who was involved in that were to see it, it could easily connect me to that person.

The Mexico article was the most surprising to me. Mostly everyone I know uses Facebook and Twitter for social purposes. But it is really nice to see that they can be used for something good too.

The biggest insight I gained was from the article that compared the elevator and Twitter. It really is important to watch what you say and post. It was weird to see the encounters broken down like that. First impressions really are everything.

THREE

Through the MBTI I found out that I am an ENTP. Which is: Extraversion. Intuition. Thinking. Perceiving. I think that this fits me very well, because during class when we got to pick what we thought we were this is what I picked. I do focus my attention on the outside world. I take information in by seeing patterns and the big picture. I make decisions on logic. And I most certainly like a flexible spontaneous approach to life. I am very independent and out going. I was not really surprised by my results. They describe me pretty well. I think that because I knew what I was going to get I do not need to change too much about how I'm learning and doing things. The way I learn is through doing and by finding meaning behind facts. I like to have a very flexible schedule. I already do all of this in my day to day life, so therefore, I think that I did not really learn much from doing this MBTI experiment. It really just reconfirmed what I already thought/knew.

TWO

I have always wanted to do a lot of things with my life. My bucket list could probably go on and on. I’ve already done a few things on my bucket list like go out of the country and volunteer. However, there are still many other things I would like to do. I would like to sky dive, bungee jump, and parasail. I’d like to go deep see diving and explore caves. I want to travel the world. I’ve already been to Mexico, Costa Rica, Cancun, and Ireland, but I would like to go to even more places. I want to try crazy things in these different countries too, like the food or different practices they participate in. I would also enjoy learning a new language. I’ve got my eyes set on sign language at the moment since Spanish didn’t work out so well for me in high school. Are you kidding me with all the different verb conjugations? No thank you… yuck.

As for my time at Iowa State, I would just like to have a good time. I want to fully enjoy my experience here. It’s been hard for me to adjust to the whole school aspect of it. School isn’t my favorite, but I’m going to be here for eight years so enjoying it to the fullest is something I really want to do. I would also like to stick with the clubs I’m in and possibly join some new ones. Right now, my plan is to go to Veterinary Medicine school and become a Small Animal Veterinarian. Therefore, a huge and very important goal I have is to get into the Veterinary Medicine program at Iowa State. It’s a tough field and a tough program to get into, so being able to do that would be amazing. Hopefully, once/if I get in to the program I will graduate and become a Small Animal Veterinarian. I would love to have a private practice and a clinic to work in after graduation. That would be ideal. I would like to keep that job and continue on with it for years.

As for my life outside of school, I just want to go with the flow. I don’t feel like making goals or saying I want to be married with X kids by the time I’m 30 or what not. I just want to see how it works out. I like just letting life come to me. As long as I can do some of the things I mentioned up top, that’d be pretty swell. I want to travel and see the world. I want to learn new things and try new things. Whatever happens in between will happen. Life isn’t all about plans all the time. However it plans out, I’ll make the best of it and be happy.

ONE

To be quite honest, thinking of a time when I was at my best was hard for me. I have always been pushed to be the best, and I have always strived to be the best. So thinking of a time, when I was at my best, but not necessarily number one, made me sit down and think. However, after some time, I realized that it did not have to be some amazing feet I accomplished or some stupendous thing that would blow everyone away. That is why, I think that the time I was at my best was my last semester of my Senior year of high school.

I grew up in Carroll, County and I went to Carroll High School. My high school and I never really got along great, but I still tried to work the hardest I could and receive the grades I wanted. During my senior year, I held three jobs, was on the honor roll, was involved in speech and drama, the fall play, and KINS(Kids Into Not Smoking), and also took around another 12 college credits.

Everyone always says from the last day of eighth grade, and even yet in college now, to get involved. I was involved in sports my first three years of high school, along with speech and drama, but that only made me realize I could do more. I liked being a busy body and practices and rehearsals and meetings kept me busy no doubt. Having all of these responsibilities gave me wonderful time management skills. I now know, that I can take the hardest classes offered at my high school, have practice almost every night, have a meeting in the morning, and work in between. Somehow, although I was exhausted sometimes, I made it work for me. I'm learning now, in my Philosophy class, that Aristotle described happiness as being active, and now I understand why.

The three jobs I worked were at St. Anthony Regional Hospital, Jeanine's Hallmark, and at the Carroll Country Club. Each job was quite different from the other. At the hospital I would record food intakes and the CC intake of the patients. While at Hallmark, I would run the cash register and assist customers. However, at the Country Club, I would bartend. I'm not entirely sure what possessed me to have three jobs while in high school, but I'm sure it has something to do with my father. My dad has never stopped working for as long as I can remember. He doesn't have days off or vacation, but he does have enough money for anything he has ever wanted. I think somewhere very early on down the line, I figured out that 'hey, I need to work for what I want, because there aren't any hand me outs in life.' (And then I receive this nifty little scholarship, ironic, eh?) Sometimes I would go from one job to the next, or would have a small break in between, but I always was on time, and I always worked my hardest once I was there. I knew I had to save up for college, and I knew there was only one way to do that.

Now, my senior year was kickin' right along. I was getting straight A's, I was working, I was involved. All of these things have helped me prepare for college in a great way. Time management and money management are two very important things to learn and to be able to attain in your freshman year of college, and I feel as though I was well prepared my senior year.

Then, a not so great thing happened. Around the beginning of my second semester, my Aunt Valerie was diagnosed with cancer for about, I would say the 9 millionth time. Okay, it was realistically probably her seventh or eighth, but it seemed like more than that to me. My Mother has two older brothers, DJ and Jamie, and one older sister, Valerie. They were all adopted, but you would never be able to tell in a million years because of how close we all are. We all oddly look alike too, so there's that. Any way, my Auntie had beaten cancer so many times, for so many years, and now it was back again. Only this time, things were different. It was everywhere. The first few times she had it, it was in her colon, intestines, stomach, places that they could target and remove the mass or at least centralize the chemotherapy. This time, it was in her colon, intestines, stomach, esophagus, lymph nodes, bones, I really do mean everywhere. Around Christmas, my Mother went up to Wisconsin to visit her. I had to stay home because I couldn't get out of work. This is really where my time management came in. I regret not going to see her so often, because had I known, I would have been there in a heartbeat.

When Rachel, my mother, came back I could tell things weren't good. My cousin Nickolaus had gotten married in April the year before and the difference between my Auntie then and around Christmas was unbelievable. However, she had beat it how many times before, so why would this time be any different? Well, it was. And around April of my senior year, all of my family went to visit her in her Hospice. I had spoken to my cousin Jennifer on the phone before going up to visit, and her exact words were, "Whatever you're envisioning in your head, it's a million times worse." She was right. Had I known that Christmas would have been the last time that my Auntie was able to talk to me, or recognize me, or move her arms to see me, I would not have missed it for anything. The experience of seeing someone you love so much, in so much pain, and so helpless, is something that no one can imagine unless you go through it. I learned so much about life and family and friends while I was there, it was unbelievable. The strength she had to the very end was truly inspiring.

We couldn't stay there forever though. We extended our flight twice for two days, because everyday we thought was going to be the last day. But eventually, we really did have to go home. Going back to the three jobs, the commitments, the college credits and straight A's, seemed ridiculous at first. Why did it even matter any more when that is what can happen?

It took me a little while to see that what I had been doing wasn't exactly what I needed to be doing. Valerie lived this amazingly full life because she was busy, because she cared, and because she always tried her best, and, because she always made time for herself, but much more importantly other people. That now, is always what I do. I can see now that being busy is a good thing, but you don't always have to be so busy that you never have time for yourself or others. I still worked my three jobs, and I still got the good grades, but I started to take time for myself. To do the things I wanted to do. To see a movie here and there. To read a book not required for a class. To hang out with my family and friends more. Because life comes at you quick, and it isn't worth it to waste it doing what you think you should do, when you will be just fine doing you want to do.